You are probably giving your child help with their homework, most parents do. But you may be missing the one, sure sign that what you are doing is not helping your child learn.
Helping your child with homework is a good way to make sure that your child is keeping up with their schoolwork, but it can be a hassle. I have known many parents become frustrated and angry when they try to help their child do their work.
You want your child to produce their best work so that they get good marks, and you encourage your child to try hard, make their work look good, finish their work on time, and make sure that they hand it in on the right day.
Doing all these is fine, as long as you and your child are happy and getting along well. But this is not always the case. When they get home parents are often tired after a hard days work and helping a child with homework is the last thing they feel like doing. So, rather than helping with a good will and with lots of patience, they may provide support grudgingly and, if their child does not respond in the way they want, stat to get frustrated and angry.
I have had phone calls from parents when all I could hear was quiet sobbing on the other end of the line!
It didn’t take me long to figure out what was going on. The homework hassle had got out of hand and the mother was so frustrated with her child that she was desperate for help. She had no idea what she could do. She told me that she had tried everything to get her daughter to do her work but had only succeeded in making her daughter angry and herself upset.
I am sure that she was not the only parent who has found themselves in this situation.
To all you parents who have found yourself in a similar situation – and you know who you are- I have some very important words to say.
If you or your child are not happy about the help you give with homework it is not working!
You are wasting your time and your energy as well as putting your relationship with your child in jeopardy.
If you are in this situation, stop now! Stop doing things that do not feel good. Neither you nor your child are benefiting from the situation.
If you haven’t completed the free Parent Starter Kit at the top of this blog now might be a good time to download it.
The solution to this problem is very easy to say but more difficult to do.
